A video has been doing rounds since yesterday on social media. It shows a guy carrying a girl’s limp body and walking towards a hospital. While the video shows just that, its context is sickening to the core. The boy dumps a girl’s body at the emergency ward and flees the scene. This guy introduces himself as the girl’s close relative to the hospital staff, but he notices the policemen standing there and escapes.
That boy, now identified as Usama, is none other than the unfortunate girl’s ‘friend’. The girl (avoiding mentioning her name to save the integrity of the deceased) was a student of Government College University. About 17 or 18 years of age, she was reportedly in an illicit relationship with Usama. She had gotten pregnant and had to go for an abortion.
Apparently, her ‘friend’ was unable to help her in any regard (for something he was equally or perhaps more responsible). So, the girl took Rs.200,000 from her family under the garb of university’s fee and was taken to an illegal abortion clinic. She developed many complications after the procedure, as is the case with the illegal clinics. Usama took her to the private teaching hospital when her condition deteriorated. She was allegedly received dead by the hospital staff.
This unfortunate incident might not be the only one in our country. This one got the limelight in media, so the majority of people would know it. The climax of this (what seemed to be ‘in the heaven’ or ‘out of this world’ to the protagonists) tragic love story is that a girl lost her life, a family lost its daughter, the boy lost his freedom (as he has been arrested under the charges of murder) and might lose his life too. But these outcomes are just what’s visible. After this incident, many families would not have the heart to send out their girls afar for education. Many parents would be unable to trust their daughters. This incident of downright indiscretion and negligence has shut the doors for many women out there.
The girl was hard of age when she indulged in something she might not even understand. One might say that both of them got carried away, but at what cost? On social media, there is a heated debate going on about this issue. Many people are encouraging even underage marriages. Some are blaming the coeducation system and the infamous ‘behayai’. The fact is that most of these debates are circulating around the girls—how they are sent to hostels for education but they indulge in other activities and bring a bad name to the family. We are forgetting that there was another party to this. And it was more or at least equally responsible for that. How about we transfer the discussion about upbringing and blame games from the girls to the boys. How about we teach our boys AND girls about responsibility/accountability for their actions? If we intend and succeed in doing that, there would not be any need for underage marriages, segregating the public spaces, and shunning away from the girls’ right to education. But are we even ready to have this debate?
Here are two cents by Neelam Aslam on this issue:
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